The longer I live, the more I am in awe of the mystery of the human soul.  This eternal part of each of us that somehow instinctively knows that the ways of this world are completely out of whack and that we were made for more.  This part of us that seeks the hard road rather than the easy road because it knows that something worth fighting for is its own reward and so much more valuable than any simple pleasure easily attained. This inner life that, when we will be still and quiet and humble, can commune with our Creator God and be restored no matter how wayward it has become.  The Bible tells us that it is the Spirit of God himself that woos each and every soul to Himself.  It also says that we can grieve that Spirit and quench its power in our lives if we ignore it long enough.  I know of no greater tragedy.

I am currently reading a book called In God's Underground, written by Richard Wurmbrand, a Lutheran minister during the dark days of communist rule in Romania.  He was put in prison for his faith more than once during that time.  The first stint was for 9 years.  He went into prison and his one and only son was a 9-year old boy.  He came out of prison to be introduced to his son, the 18 year old man, without being allowed a single visit from him during those years.  Such a loss of years and time, and yet God had preserved both of their souls exquisitely.  On the night of his unexpected return from prison (they simply opened the gates and let him go one day) his son, Mihai, said to him, "Father, you've gone through so much. I want to know what you've learned from all your sufferings."  Wurmbrand put his arm around his grown son and said, "Mihai, I've nearly forgotten my Bible in all this time. But four things were always in my mind. First, that there is a God. Secondly, Christ is our Savior. Thirdly, there is eternal life. And fourthly, love is the best of ways."  My son said, "That was all I wanted." Later he told his father that he had decided to become a pastor.  Two souls who had gone through so much heartache and pain, poverty and suffering - but perfectly sustained and more beautiful than they were at the beginning.

Once Wurmbrand had settled back in with his family at his very meager home in the attic of a building owned by another (their house had been taken by the government when he went to prison), he said, "Now that I was free, I longed in the depths of my heart for quietness and rest. But communism was working everywhere to complete the destruction of the Church. The peace I desired would have been an escape from reality and dangerous for my soul."  It is only God who can put such depth into the human soul.  Such selflessness is actually soulfulness!  Denying the self for the benefit of the eternal soul.  This is not harmful or sadistic, this is exchanging the temporal for the eternal and it is wise beyond earth's wisdom.  When everything in us and everyone around us is telling us that retirement from the cause is in order - you've done enough - surely someone else can take up the torch now. To have a soul that knows that its very existence is owed to a Savior who did not stop until the fight was won.  To have a soul that knows that it will be sustained by God through far worse than the mind or heart believe it to be able to bear.  To have a soul that seeks to grow and expand and draw closer to the God who created it and wooed it from the beginning.  To have a soul that trusts in the reality of the perfect plan and the power of God more than in the temporal realities it can see and feel.

This is the goal.  What interesting, mysterious, paradoxical ways God can and does bring it about in each of us.
May I never curse my circumstances without first examining their soil for soul-growth properties.  It could be that what the world calls prison, my soul recognizes as true freedom.

Isaiah 46:4 NIV, "Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you."

What does it mean to be filled with joy?  A young mother of three with a new baby on the way just lost her husband in a car accident this past week in the small California town that our family calls home.  Where is the joy in that?  A friend is working through the process to adopt a child who has called her, "Mommy," for about a year now and the system is getting more convoluted, not less, as time goes by.  Where is the joy in that?  A beloved relative is in the hospital with bleeding in his brain.  Where is the joy in that?  I have a nephew who I have only seen in pictures who is celebrating his 2nd Christmas and a trip to visit and take in that moment with my own eyes isn't in the budget.  Where is the joy in that? 

This Sunday, our church will light the candle of JOY on the advent wreath.  First was hope, then came peace, now JOY.  I have been reflecting on the idea of JOY in preparation for this coming Sunday, and frankly, no revelations were happening in my heart, mind or soul.  But I kept looking.  This morning, I picked up the devotional book (Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young) and there it was. Staring me in the face on the page designated to read on December 10th of each year.  Even so, I didn't recognize it right away.  It was couched in a lesson on security.  "Make Me the focal point of your search for security," it started.  My mind started to wander.  Clearly, this wasn't going to illuminate the Bible's teaching on JOY for me.  Alas, I kept reading, albeit a little miffed and disappointed. 

"Make Me the focal point of your search for security.  In your private thoughts, you are still trying to order your world so that it is predictable and feels safe.  Not only is this an impossible goal, but it is also counterproductive to spiritual growth.  When your private world feels unsteady and you grip My hand for support, you are living in conscious dependence on Me.  Instead of yearning for a problem-free life, REJOICE that trouble can highlight your awareness of My Presence.  In the darkness of adversity, you are able to see more clearly the radiance of My Face.  Accept the value of problems in this life, considering them pure JOY.  Remember that you have an eternity of trouble-free living awaiting you in heaven." - taken from the inspiration Isaiah 41:10; Psalm 139:10; James 1:2.

Could it be that JOY and security are tightly bound together?   The newly widowed mother whose life suddenly looks nothing like she planned, the friend called "Mommy" by a child born to another waiting on the legal system to make it so, the uncle in the hospital whose physical health is fragile and uncertain, the aunt who has no assurance of when she will see her nephew.  We all have something in common.  We all lack the security of knowing the future.  This devotional reminded me that we can all have something else in common too, if we will choose it: a heightened awareness of the presence of God that others on more seemingly steady ground cannot know.  These areas of our lives where security is stretched thin and it feels like we are walking on spider webs where they should be pavement, these are the moments, the days, the seasons where we can experience what it is truly like to be carried in the arms of God.

I remember as a little girl, as I was getting a bit too big to be carried places on a parent's hip or shoulders.  I would take utter delight in the moments when I could "trick" my Daddy into believing that I had fallen asleep on the couch in the evenings.  Without fail, he would scoop me up and carry me to bed.  Tucking me in and kissing me on the forehead, while I pretended not to notice, as I faked sleep.  Once he was out of the room, I would open my eyes and smile, relishing the moment.  There was something so special about being physically carried by someone who loved me so tenderly.  

We don't have to fake neediness on earth.  We are needy.  Sometimes our neediness is more obvious than others, and in those moments (as others feel sorry for us) we get to stop pretending that we have it all together.  We get to stretch up our hands, with tears in our eyes and cry out, "Daddy, God, I NEED you!"  And after He has carried us for a season, through things we couldn't handle on our own, we can open our eyes as we find ourselves resting in the evidence of His security and smile in a knowing way that others can't.  We can remember the feel of His strong arms and the sound of His heartbeat and His kiss on our cheek, and His loving words, and we will know a deeper joy than we could ever feel without having been carried.

Consider it all joy, if your predictable, safe world is anything but predictable and safe this Christmas season.  Your Daddy will carry you through it. 

He sent His one and only son, Jesus, to be born of a virgin, to live a sinless life, yet die a sinner's death on your behalf and to be resurrected from death to eternal life just to make a way for you to run into the arms of His perfect Father and call Him your own at such a time as this.  I pray that you will let Him.

So do not fear, for I am with you;
    do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
    I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. - Isaiah 41:10


7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
    if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
    if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
    your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
    and the light become night around me,”
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
    the night will shine like the day,
    for darkness is as light to you. - Psalm 139:7-12



Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds - James 1:2

When our son was a toddler, we learned a nifty parenting trick.  After suffering through meltdown after meltdown whenever it was time to transition from one activity to the next, we discovered that if we gave our son a 5 or 10 minute warning before the transition was about to happen, the meltdowns were a thing of the past.  "Tim, it will be time to help clean up toys and say goodbye in ten minutes."  "Tim, dinner will be in five minutes, so get ready to stop your video." As long as he knew what was coming and when, he could cope.  When he had time to wrap things up or finish on his own terms, he was golden.  If the meltdown wasn't completely averted, it was at least lessened in severity.

Don't you wish we had the luxury of those kinds of warnings in life as adults.  "Carla, in six months you will not be living here any more and you'll have to start over."  "Carla, within the year, that person that you are so attached to will pass away."  "Carla, in the next week someone in your family will become ill."  Just a little warning, wouldn't that be nice?  Just a little heads up so we can wrap our minds around what is coming and finish or adjust on our own terms. 

The thing is, these little advance warnings weren't the most valuable things we could offer our son.  Yes, they made life a little more bearable in the moment, especially as he was making his way through those toddler years, but it was never meant to be a way of life.  After all, we wouldn't always have a warning ourselves.  Sometimes we would need to make a transition with little to no warning and we would need him to trust us and spring into action before his emotions could catch up.  What we really wanted him to learn were things like - Your Mom and Dad love you and we are in charge.  We know what is best and we are working with an agenda that includes more than your immediate happiness, things you just aren't prepared to understand yet.  The more you trust us, the more you will see that we have your best interest at heart.  We may ask you to do some things that you do not want to do, but it is never out of cruelty.  At the end of the day, what we really wanted him to learn to do was to rest in our trustworthiness, and to respond based on our relationship not on an attachment to an established, predictable routine.

The same is true with our walk through life.  The routine will inevitably vary, so putting our trust in things always being the way they have been in the past is foolish.  Many times God will orchestrate situations in such a way as to soften the blows of painful change.  Other times, however, we will be called upon to simply respond in faith-filled obedience, when there is no resemblance of the normal routine anywhere in sight, no promise of how things will be resolved or how long the transition to a new normal will take.

In the end, through the pages of scripture, I have been given three things that are of greater value than a glimpse into the immediate future:

1. I have been given a glimpse into eternity. "And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am." John 14:3
   
2. I have been given a guarantee never to walk alone.  "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6
   
3. I have been given a promise of God's unending love. "For God so loved the world, that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16

At the end of the day, this is what has been offered to me and it is what I have to offer the world.  It isn't a safe, predictable routine, it is a relationship with the One who created all of us and has a vested interest in our future.  It isn't an advance warning system of difficult changes that lie ahead and it isn't a promise that life will be easy or pain-free.  It is the message of the gospel and it is enough.

For the past two days, I've been dealing with a sudden onset of lower back pain.  A couple trips to the chiropractor and some x-rays to rule out anything serious, and I am now feeling 65% better.  Any time an ache or pain slows me down, I HATE IT.  I hate being sick.  I hate injuries.  I don't manage health related setbacks well.  I'm not a fun patient.  I just want it to "be over."

Meanwhile, I have a friend in California, a mom of three elementary school-aged kids, who is being treated for Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy. RSD (as I understand it) is an unexplainable disease of the nervous system that is triggered by an injury.  The nervous system and body "overreact" to the injury and go a little haywire, making the pain related to the injury disproportionately severe.  Not only that, but the intense pain spreads to other body parts not affected by the injury, basically making life completely miserable, if not unbearable even after the injury heals.

Suddenly, perspective settles in.  Why was I complaining again?

My friend is currently undergoing a Ketamine treatment that requires her to be at the hospital from 8 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. every day.  The side effects include nausea, vomiting, extreme fatigue, and hallucinations.  She has had all of these.

From now on when my back twinges or pain wakes me up at night when I try to roll over in bed, I'm going to stop and pray for my friend instead of focusing on my own pain.  Would you do the same?  You don't have to know her name or anything about her really... just pray for my friend... a fellow planet-wanderer who has been thrown a difficult curve ball.  

So how do you pray?

• Pray for the hallucinations to cease.  
  
• Pray for the vomiting to stop.
  
• Pray for her as she is away from her kids and misses them.
  
• Pray for her mental stability as this treatment will be long and she'll need more emotional and physical energy reserves than Wonder Woman.
  
• Pray for her spiritually, that God will be very sweet and tender with her and that she would see evidences of His work on her behalf and find ways to continue giving thanks (as she already has).
  
• Pray for her husband.  No man is equipped to see his wife in pain without being able to alleviate it.  Pray for his endurance and his sensitivity. Pray for his emotional and physical health.
  
• Pray for her kids.  This is one strong mama, and it won't be easy for her kids to see her in a weakened state.  
  
• Pray for her parents.  No matter how old you are, your mom and dad will always see you as their baby.  Pray for their peace of mind.
  
• Pray for a miracle of healing.  God is capable of it.
  

Maybe if in our own pain (whether it is emotional, spiritual, or physical), we can be reminded of the ache of another and lift her up in prayer, none of our pain will be in vain.  And God will bring a kind of healing we never could have imagined. 

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 12:9).

Life is not a day at the beach it is a swim in the ocean.  This is the thought that I have been considering this morning.  Here are my conclusions:

1. Sitting on the shore is not really living; it is coming right up to the edge of living and then refusing to enter the fray.  It is admiring the power and and pleasure of life but being too afraid to dive in.  It is safer, but it misses the point.  

2. Others may appear to be better swimmers (life-livers) than you are, but we aren't in it for a an hour, or a day, or even a week.  We are in it for the long haul.  In time, everyone struggles.  It doesn't matter how confident or "well equipped" we are.  You can only tread water for so long before you need someone to throw you a life line.

3. Jesus Christ, the Word who became flesh, is the ultimate life preserver.  (Psalm 119)


4. The point of a life preserver is to keep you afloat in deep water.  To keep you just as alive in the depths as you are on the beach.


5. What point is there in obtaining a life preserver and wearing it while sitting in the sand with only your toes in the water?  Why accept the saving grace of Jesus Christ and then live within your own strength, settling for only what is safe and easy?


Luke 17:33 Whoever tries to keep their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life will preserve it.

Today I was adding new music to my iPod for my commute to work and I started exploring the songs of JJ Heller.  I'd heard a few, but I wanted to hear more.  

One song in particular struck me immediately.  It is entitled, "Who You Are."  It describes the lives of individuals who are going through trying times; life isn't looking the way they thought it would, and they are in pain.  In their sorrow and confusion, they admit that they don't know what God is doing.  I can still hear the chorus ringing in my ears, "I don't know, I don't know what You're doing.  But I know who You are."

We can get through a lot when we know who we are walking through it with.  When we are sure.  100% certain.  No doubts.  We don't have to know everything in every situation, but we do have to know one thing for sure.  Who is it that walks with me?

The most heart-wrenching time in any relationship comes when one offends the other to the point where the offendee begins to not only take offense at the wrong doing, but to go so far as to question whether or not he really knew this friend in the first place.  This sense of betrayal is a common theme in movies.  We've all heard lines like, "I never even knew you."  or "Who are you, anyway?"   It feeds into our innate fear of trust.  Our fear of giving ourselves completely to another person.  There is always the risk that the wool is being pulled over your eyes, that what you wanted to believe about your friend, or lover, or parent, or mentor isn't actually true.  That's when the walls crumble down around you and the way out seems bleak.

BUT, what if you knew?  What if you never had to wonder?  What if you were absolutely certain that the character & capacity of the one you put your trust in was ROCK SOLID?  How many more confusing times could you make your way through together?  How many perceived offenses could you see past? How much deeper could the water get without you panicking?  How much higher would the mountains be that you could climb with him beside you?  It is almost impossible to fathom, if you have been repeatedly burned in your earthly relationships... that this kind of trust could exist.

When JJ Heller sings, "Who You Are," this is what she is singing about. She is reminding herself and all of us that we can know God.  His character is described vividly and consistently in the Bible and we can count on him to be who He says He is. Every. Single. Time.  

Circumstances will change.

God will not.

*This is cheating, because it is really better when you open your own Bible and pray your very own prayers and let God show Himself to you PERSONALLY, but - if you need a jump-start, a crash course in the character of God - this is a good place to start.

Not one moment that we spend reading the Bible, praying, listening to godly men and women teach and share, acting on what we learn, not one single moment is wasted.  Over time, each of these acts becomes a building block in our relationship with Jesus Christ.  His character IS rock solid.  But in our fallen human state, having encountered unpredictable and untrustworthy people time and time again, we don't come to put our full weight on Him over night.  It comes in time.  It is built by experience.  Give Him a chance.  He will prove to be exactly who He says He is, and that knowledge can make the sun rise after even the darkest of nights.

On a recent trip to the National Zoo, we had a great time watching this meerkat.  The other meerkats in the habitat were rolling in the dirt, playing, and digging, but this one climbed up on the highest rock in the enclosure and stood very still and just looked, systematically, in every possible direction.  The educational plaque hanging on the wall nearby explained that this behavior is common for meerkats.  Since they are such tiny creatures and generally walk on all-fours, meerkats will frequently pull themselves up on their hind legs to get a better, higher view of their surroundings and search for predators.  

This week on my commute to work, I've been reading in Genesis about the life of Joseph.  You remember Joseph - the coat of many colors, being sold into slavery by his brothers, being bought by the Captain of the Guard in Egypt, ending up in prison (unjustly), interpreting dreams beyond his own capability, being restored and elevated to the position of second in command to the pharaoh, saving his family from the effects of a severe famine, being reunited with his father who thought he was dead.  AMAZING LIFE STORY to be sure.  The thing that struck me this week as I read through the account of the life of Joseph again was that He was always experiencing God's favor, regardless of his circumstances:
1. His brothers threw him in a pit, but didn't kill him.  
2. He was sold into slavery, but everything he did prospered and he was not treated like a slave in the home of Potiphar.
3. He was put into prison unjustly, but again everything he did there prospered and he was given responsibility and meaningful work even in prison.
4. He was offered a high position in the government of the pharaoh which he did not seek out.
5. Everything he did in Egypt prospered and his work there resulted in saving a nation from a devastating famine and in restoring his family to him.

As I read and reflected on Joseph's life, I was reminded that we cannot gauge whether or not we are living out God's will for our lives based on our circumstances.  After all, Joseph was rejected by his brothers. a slave, and a prisoner, all while being right where God wanted him to be. A better gauge of living out God's will, it seems, is His favor.   God's favor plays out in the smallest of ways and on the grandest of scales, but is of equal value regardless of the way it is displayed.  Sometimes we have to be like that meerkat, and rise above our own limited perspective and try to catch a glimpse of what is really going on in the midst of our suffering.  If we don't, we are destined to be enslaved to our current circumstances and our limited interpretations of them.  


This is more than looking for a "silver-lining."  This is about remaining faith-filled in our attitudes and faithful in our actions regardless of our situation.  Refusing to despair when we know we are on the path God wants for us.  Submitting to the route that He has deemed best and looking for evidences of His favor along the way to keep us going.  When we are in the pit (rejected by those who are supposed to love us and protect us), in slavery (stuck in a difficult situation without any control over it), or imprisoned unjustly (falsely accused and punished without cause) - may we rise up to our full height (in his mercy and grace) and look for evidences of favor smack dab in the middle of the pain and difficulty.  If they are there, then we have cause to rejoice in the midst of the mess and hold on for the deliverance that will surely come.  If they are absent, we have cause to repent and wait for the restoration that God has promised never to withhold from His children.

Psalm 121:1-2  (NIV)
"I lift up my eyes to the mountains-- where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth."

Psalm 30:5 (NIV)
"For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning."

"When it is most difficult to worship God is when it is most important to worship God." ~Mandisa

On Tuesday, January 15th, I tuned in online to watch "A Night of Hope and Healing."  I was not disappointed.  Not only was I not disappointed, I was inspired and thrilled to my core at the display of the love of Christ that was taking place.  The event won't get any national media attention, but I can't let it go by without talking about it here.  It was profound to me.

The event was billed as "a free event designed to bring comfort to the community (surrounding Newtown, CT) through music, prayer, and uplifting messages."  The lineup of talented servants was impressive: Louie Giglio, Max Lucado, Steven & Mary Beth Chapman, Mandisa, TobyMac, Building 429, Laura Story and Casting Crowns.  Lest you think, the ulterior motive of this event was to make money - It was a FREE event, and 10,000 tickets were distributed to the Sandy Hook victims' families and community members affected by the recent school shooting.  I can't even begin to fathom what putting on this event cost.  To say it was an extravagant gift to total strangers, is an understatement.  Here is a taste of what the event included:

Familiar scriptures were recited corporately - the Lord's Prayer, the 23rd Psalm - taking on more personal meaning in light of recent events.  Less familiar scriptures were proclaimed boldly: 

Psalm 34:18, "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."

Hebrews 4:14-16, "Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess.  For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet was without sin.  Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need."

Songs were sung with rich lyrics that ministered healing to those who would accept it:

Amazing Grace
It is Well With My Soul
Beauty Will Rise:
"It was the day the world went wrong. I screamed til my voice was gone, And watched through the tears as everything came crashing down. Slowly panic turns to pain, as we awake to what remains and sift through the ashes that are left behind. But buried deep beneath all our broken dreams, we have this hope:
Out of these ashes... beauty will rise and we will dance among the ruins. We will see Him with our own eyes. Out of these ashes... beauty will rise. For we know, joy is coming in the morning..."
Whom Shall I Fear:
"I know Who goes before me.  I know Who stands behind.  The God of angel armies is always by my side."
Broken Hallelujah:
"When all I can sing is a broken hallelujah, when my only offering is shattered praise, Still a song of adoration will rise up from these ruins.  I will worship You and give You thanks, even when my only praise is a broken hallelujah."

Stories were shared. Mary Beth Chapman, in particular, shared openly, while holding back tears about the tragic loss of their own 5 year old daughter, Maria.  Letting those present know they were not alone and they would not be forgotten.  She shared her conviction through it all that in the end God is enough and He is faithful.

Prayers were prayed. At one point the names of each of the victims of the Sandy Hook shooting were displayed in the stadium and a time of silent prayer for their families took place.  Louie Giglio told the group that the pictures and stories of each victim were on display backstage and that the performers had been looking at them and reading about them and asking God for help to minister to those left behind.

One of the performers tried his best to explain why they had all come and put on the event: "We just want to bless you and encourage you and enter into your pain with you and say we hurt too, and tell you
of the God who makes life worth living."  I'd say mission accomplished, and I've never been more inspired by a group of fellow believers trying to live out their faith in the world.  

Some of the heartfelt comments I jotted down as I watched include these:
Louie Giglio said, "In times like this people ask, 'Where is God?'  We are the body of Christ. We aren't a building with four walls, an institution, an organization. We are the hands and feet of Jesus in this world.  If the world is going to see Jesus, they will see him through His sons and daughters.  Where is God? God is here because the people of God are here." 


Steven Curtis Chapman: "The world keeps spinning, leaving many paralyzed, angry, numb and stuck while the world goes on. We have not forgotten you.  Not because we are wonderful in and of ourselves but because Jesus is in us. We may move forward, but we will not move on.  We will keep listening to you, praying for you."

"I drove a stake down in the ground when everything went dark in my life.  Even though I am still angry at times and even though I still don't get it - I have two choices - run away from God or run toward God and trust Him and trust His word is true. He is whispering, 'WILL YOU TRUST ME? I know your heart is broken.  Will you trust me?' The story ISN'T over.  We have lost so much but nothing is lost to God."

Max Lucado: "What Steven Curtis Chapman just did for you, you will one day do for someone else.  For the rest of your life you can speak from a place of 'been there.' If you'll let God be your teacher then what was intended for evil will bear good - you will be a missionary to the brokenhearted."

The Night of Hope and Healing was an absolutely perfectly lived-out illustration of why I am a Christian.  We do not "have" souls, we ARE souls and that night a group of humble, talented, people acknowledged the soul ache (that continues in CT long after the media attention fades away) and very respectfully and gently provided an outlet for those souls to reflect on the the Word of God, to pray and praise and thank and cry, and to find a way back to their Maker for restoration.  Beautiful and powerful to behold.

The most poignant moment to me was when Chris Tomlin and a full band was singing the song, "I Will Rise" (listen below).  There is a part of the song where the lyrics say: "Jesus has overcome, and the grave is overwhelmed. The victory is won. He is risen from the dead." The 10,000 people in the arena began to clap and cheer upon singing "The victory is won," and the clapping was so loud Chris Tomlin just stopped playing. And waited.  And let the moment happen.  People continued in their applause for several minutes and then they continued with the song.  Truly, worship is never more beautiful than when it is offered in times of great sacrifice. When I find it hard to worship in the future because of something that has caused me pain, I will remember that night and offer a sacrifice of praise.

One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp is a best selling book.  Many, MANY have read it and been changed by its message.  I have resisted.  I have resisted because I am prone to resistance.  I am known to resist the new and the popular at times.  Why?  Who knows.  Chalk it up to whatever makes most sense to you and call it a day.  What matters is that whatever wall I had built up around this book and whatever reasons I had that were keeping me from receiving its message are now gone.  Today, Ann released on her blog the first 20 minute video that will be a part of a DVD set that will be available to help small groups process One Thousand Gifts together.  I watched it.  I now "get it."  I had to let Ann know.

Go to Ann's blog to watch the video.  It is moving and poignant and refreshing.  I'm looking forward to seeking out the 1,000+ gifts that God has given and continues to give in my life and naming them.

Well they say it's your birthday!  Well it's my birthday too!  

We are getting ready to head out on a hike to Cedar Falls in a little while, but I wanted to write down some thoughts that are on my mind before we head out and I get busy with the plans of the day.  I hope these reflections will be a blessing to you as they have been to me today.

In church this morning, we read a portion of the account of the life of Joseph from the book of Genesis in the Bible.  Here are the notes I wrote as I listened and pondered God's goodness in the life of Joseph even as things around him were less than idyllic:

• In Chapter 40, verse 13 of Genesis, Joseph is in prison and interprets a dream for the Pharaoh's cup-bearer (a fellow prisoner) in which he tells him that the Pharaoh will "lift up his head" and restore him to his position.  I find it interesting (and heart-wrenching) that Joseph ends up being the bearer of this good news.  How Joseph must have longed for his God to lift HIS head and restore HIM to HIS position, and yet it was not time.  The cup-bearer had only been in prison a short period of time, while Joseph had been behind bars for years at this point.  He deserved to be set free, but God gave him the task of proclaiming another's freedom.  How ironic.  How humbling. How difficult!  Still, Joseph was faithful.
  
• In Chapter 41, verse 16, Joseph points Pharaoh to the One True God even though the Pharaoh, who was considered as a god in his culture, was willing to give the credit to Joseph.  It becomes obvious that honesty reigns supreme in Joseph's value system here.  This makes me think, Do I trust God enough to give Him the glory when others (even "important others") are willing to give the credit and glory to ME and exalt ME - especially at those times when emotionally and spiritually, I really feel like I could use a little "lifting of my head?"  Or do I honestly believe that in due time God will exalt me and that His opinion is the only one that matters and that all other exaltation is inferior to His?

The applause of men can be enticing, especially when we are feeling low or needy, but accepting it is dishonest and settling for it is foolish when the God of the universe deserves the credit and the God of the universe is the true lifter of your head.  


Psalm 3:3 (NLT) "But you, O LORD, are a shield around me; you are my glory, the one who holds my head high." 


On my birthday today, I praise the One who knit me together in my mother's womb and who, in His great mercy, has saved my soul and given me a life filled with meaning and purpose!  He has repeatedly lifted my head in due time and been my source of greatest joy and greatest satisfaction in life.  May I serve him well with as many more days/weeks/years as He gives me!